Sunday, December 25, 2005

Q35: What to do if my girlfriend is infatuated with another guy?

What do I do if my girlfriend is infatuated with another guy?
-in need of Prozzak

Hey, Prozzak--
(And, in case ya'll don't get that reference, listen to "INFATUATION" by Prozzak.)

First off, what do you mean by "infatuated"? Is it a crush that she just likes to giggle over? Or does she drop everything she's doing to go hang out w/ him? Does she like him better than you?

Why is she with you? What do you want from your relationship with her, and what does she want? If you've got a fun and not-so-serious or not-committed relationship, then is dating around permissible? Does she want to do stuff w/ this guy and not you? Why isn't she doing stuff with him, then? Are you her "security blanket"? If it's her crush or you, who would she pick? Talk this over with her.

From another beaver:
In the long run, if you really want to be with this girl:
Re-seduce the girl. If that doesn't work, dump her immediately. Otherwise, you're wasting your time. Infatuation can be conquered by romance, but if that doesn't work, then it's probably not just "infatuation." Every good relationship starts with a crush. Make her crush on you bigger than her crush on the other guy. Also, you could try cutting her loose and letting her go after the other guy. If it doesn't work and she comes crawling back to you, would you want her back? Or is there a good chance that she wouldn't crawl back? Decide what you want, from her and from you.

[Note: If this didn't answer your question, or if there are more details you'd like advice on, feel free to email/post again! :)]

Happy Holidays, Everyone! :)


At 7:47 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am in the same situation. My girlfriend last night admitted she wants someone she was seeing casually 3 years ago. This person has been a bain on our relationship for months, now I find out she wants him. She says he wouldn't want her and she want's and loves me, but this is so hard to deal with when I have no want for anyone else. She also said that she told him 4 years ago that she had feelings for him but he said no. I met her nearly 2 years ago and found out she had a casual relationship with this guy about 4 months ago. I have tried to ignore this fact but she chats with him online, apparently there is no lewd conversation, but can I believe her? I had no sleep and have contemplated killing myself over this because I love her so very much. I am so confused at why she wants this guy when she wants me, it's like she loves 2 men.

At 4:48 AM, Blogger Adi said...

Thank you for sharing.
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At 1:01 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Find someone who only wants your love. She will only hurt you. And keep you confused, she still has feelings for the guy and she hasn't let it go. And she's bringing her problems into your" relationship" she wants you to forget. But it's not working. Leave her before she leaves you.

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At 8:52 AM, Blogger Ric Mr said...

Has a guy ever given you mixed signals?

One minute he’s crazy about you and the next minute you have no clue if he ever wants to see you again?

And it’s especially hard when there’s something special between you and you have no idea what went wrong.

I assure you it’s nothing that you did.

In fact, he may even care about you a great deal and still not be able to stop himself from acting this way.

But why does this happen?

There’s one BIG reason why men do this...

And I discovered this eye opening video that will shed some light on this bizarre behaviour.

Insert subject line here and link it to: <=========> Your ex won’t be able to resist?

It all comes down to a missing “secret ingredient” that not one in a thousand women knows about...

And it’s the biggest factor that determines whether a man just “likes” you...

...or if he sees you as “The One.”

You see, this “secret ingredient” is so important to a man that no matter how attracted to you he is, or how strong your chemistry is...

If it’s missing, he’ll never be able to truly give his heart to you...

And he will always have an unshakeable urge to seek out a woman who has this one “secret ingredient.”

Here’s what I’m talking about: <=========> The difference between “like” and “love” (most women miss this)

On the other hand, when you know this powerful “secret ingredient”... won’t believe how effortless, passionate and bulletproof your relationship can be.

Trust me, this is going to blow you away.

Discover it here: ==> Men fall in love with women who have this “secret ingredient”

Thanks again.


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